Something to Look Forward To: Why Anticipation Can Be Good for Your Mental Health
Have you ever noticed how knowing something enjoyable is coming can make an ordinary week feel a little different?
Maybe you’re looking forward to dinner with someone you love on Friday.
Maybe it’s the first cool fall morning, decorating your home for a favorite season, watching the next episode of a show you’ve been enjoying, or having absolutely nothing scheduled on Saturday morning.
Sometimes it isn’t even the event itself that feels good.
Looking forward to it feels good, too.
There’s actually psychology behind that feeling.
Research has found associations between anticipating positive future events and well-being, and experimental research suggests that positive anticipation can generate positive emotion during and after stressful experiences.
That doesn’t mean we need a calendar filled with exciting plans to be emotionally healthy. And it certainly doesn’t mean that having something to look forward to is a treatment for depression, anxiety, trauma, grief, or other mental health concerns.
It does mean that giving ourselves little moments to anticipate may be one meaningful way to bring hope, connection, pleasure, and movement into everyday life.
And sometimes, that’s exactly what we need.
Why Having Something to Look Forward To Can Feel So Good
When we think about happiness, we tend to focus on the actual experience.
The vacation.
The birthday.
The concert.
The holiday.
The dinner.
But enjoyment doesn’t necessarily begin when the event begins.
There is a psychological concept called anticipatory savoring—essentially, our ability to experience and appreciate positive feelings connected with something that hasn’t happened yet. Savoring research more broadly examines how people attend to and enhance positive experiences, including through anticipation, enjoying the present moment, and remembering positive experiences afterward.
Think about planning a favorite fall tradition.
You might enjoy deciding where you’ll go.
You picture the crisp air.
You wonder which sweater you’ll wear.
You imagine the cider, pumpkins, leaves, or time spent with someone you care about.
The actual outing may last two hours.
But you may have enjoyed anticipating it for two weeks.
That’s part of what makes having something to look forward to so valuable: a positive experience can begin emotionally before it begins physically.
Something to Look Forward To Doesn't Have to Be Something Big
I think this is where we sometimes make things unnecessarily difficult for ourselves.
When someone says, “You need something to look forward to,” our minds may immediately jump to:
A vacation would be nice.
Absolutely.
But you don’t need airline tickets and a hotel reservation to experience anticipation.
Something to look forward to could be:
Coffee with a friend.
A walk on a beautiful fall afternoon.
Ordering your favorite dinner Friday night.
Visiting an apple orchard.
Starting a new book.
Decorating for fall.
Watching football on Sunday.
Trying a new recipe.
Going to a farmers market.
Seeing your grandchildren.
Taking your dog somewhere she loves.
Sleeping in.
Spending an evening without plans.
Even deciding, “Tonight, I’m going to make tea, put my phone away, and watch my favorite show” gives your mind a small point in the future associated with comfort.
Those little things count.
Actually, I think they count quite a lot.
Something to Look Forward To Can Break Up the Routine
There are seasons when life starts feeling like one long list of responsibilities.
Wake up.
Get ready.
Go to work.
Take care of everyone.
Make dinner.
Answer messages.
Do laundry.
Pay bills.
Go to bed.
Repeat.
Nothing is necessarily wrong, but life can begin to feel like something you’re managing instead of something you’re experiencing.
Having something to look forward to can create a marker in the middle of all that sameness.
Wednesday I’m meeting my friend for lunch.
Saturday we’re going to the orchard.
Tonight I’m reading instead of answering emails.
Those moments don’t eliminate responsibilities.
They simply remind us that life can contain more than responsibilities.
Positive Anticipation May Help During Stressful Times
This is one of the more interesting findings in the research.
In experimental studies, people who anticipated a future positive event experienced increased positive emotion around a stressful task, suggesting that anticipation may play a role in coping and emotional recovery from stress.
Other research has found an association between positive anticipation and well-being, including activity in brain regions involved in processing future positive events.
That doesn’t mean anticipation magically cancels stress.
You can look forward to Saturday and still have a very difficult Wednesday.
Both things can be true.
You can be stressed about work and excited about dinner with your family.
You can be grieving and enjoy a beautiful afternoon.
You can feel anxious and look forward to seeing someone you love.
Positive emotions don’t have to replace difficult emotions to matter.
We have room for both.
Give Yourself Permission to Enjoy the Anticipation
Have you ever caught yourself getting excited about something and immediately thought:
“Don’t get your hopes up.”
Sometimes we protect ourselves from disappointment by refusing to enjoy something until we’re certain it’s going to happen.
It’s understandable.
But when we do that constantly, we may miss part of the experience.
Anticipation itself can be enjoyable.
You can let yourself imagine the restaurant.
Talk about the trip.
Choose the book.
Plan the garden.
Count down the days.
Decide what you’ll cook.
You aren’t guaranteeing that everything will go perfectly.
You’re simply allowing yourself to experience some of the pleasure before the moment arrives.
What If You Don't Have Something to Look Forward To?
Maybe you’re reading this and thinking:
That’s the problem. I don’t.
Start very small.
Don’t ask yourself:
“What’s the next amazing thing happening in my life?”
Try asking:
“What could I create this week that I would genuinely enjoy?”
Notice the word create.
We often wait for something exciting to happen to us.
But many of the things we anticipate are things we intentionally place into our lives.
Text someone and make a lunch date.
Choose a movie for Friday.
Buy ingredients for something you love making.
Plan a morning walk.
Visit somewhere you’ve been meaning to go.
Give yourself Sunday afternoon without obligations.
Put something on the calendar that belongs to you.
It doesn’t have to impress anyone.
It just has to feel good to anticipate.
For more ideas for caring for your emotional well-being in everyday life, you can also explore the AACI Mental Health Resource Center.
When It's Hard to Feel Excited About Anything
There’s another side to this conversation that’s important.
Sometimes a person isn’t struggling to find something to look forward to.
They’re struggling to feel anything when they think about the future.
Things they once enjoyed don’t feel enjoyable anymore.
Plans feel exhausting.
Connecting with people feels difficult.
The future may feel empty, frightening, or simply like more of the same.
Research examining depression has found that difficulties anticipating positive future experiences can be part of the picture for some people experiencing depression.
If that describes where you are, I don’t want you to turn this article into another reason to criticize yourself.
You don’t need to tell yourself:
“Everyone else can find joy. Why can’t I?”
Persistent loss of interest or pleasure can occur with depression, and ongoing anxiety, grief, trauma, burnout, or chronic stress can also make it difficult to connect with things that normally feel meaningful.
That’s different from simply needing to plan something fun.
And it deserves compassion.
Therapy Can Help You Find Your Way Forward
Sometimes we need more than something fun on the calendar.
Sometimes we need somewhere safe to talk about why life doesn’t feel the way we want it to feel.
Therapy can provide space to explore what’s been weighing on you, understand patterns that may be keeping you stuck, reconnect with your values, strengthen relationships, and begin imagining what you would like your life to look like moving forward.
At Animal Assisted Counseling of Indiana in Munster, Indiana, we provide client-centered counseling for adults, teens, couples, and families experiencing anxiety, depression, stress, grief, trauma, relationship difficulties, and other emotional challenges.
Our approach isn’t about telling you that you should simply “think positively.”
Difficult feelings deserve room, too.
Sometimes moving forward begins with having a place where you don’t have to pretend everything is okay.
And over time, perhaps the future begins to feel a little more open again.
If you’d like to learn more about emotional wellness, visit our Mental Health Resource Center. If you’re considering counseling, you can also contact AACI to learn more or request an appointment.
Give Yourself Something to Look Forward To
Before you leave this page, I’d like you to think of one thing.
Not your five-year plan.
Not your next major accomplishment.
Just one small thing.
What is something you can look forward to?
Maybe it’s tonight.
Maybe it’s this weekend.
Maybe it’s next month.
Put it on your calendar.
Tell someone about it.
Let yourself anticipate it.
And when it arrives, try to actually be there for it.
Because emotional wellness isn’t only about learning how to get through the difficult parts of life.
It’s also about making room for the moments that remind us why we’re living it.
Sometimes hope isn’t a huge life-changing event waiting somewhere in the distance.
Sometimes it’s simply knowing:
There’s something good ahead. 💚🐾